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Chapter 1 of Atlas Slugged AGAIN, the "secret sequel" to you-know-what by you-know-who.

It's a parody.  And it's available for sale at

Where Eagles Dare to Gather

           “Who is John Glatt?”
  Dragnie Tagbord chuckled as the arms of the students before her shot with arrow-like directness and clean mechanical precision toward the ceiling. Among this group of third-graders, such a response--the lifting of hands and their display to the gaze of their instructor, each other, and to the distinguished woman visiting their school--was a proud and public announcement of knowledge. I know, proclaimed each raised hand. I know, with pure awareness in the consciousness of my mind, the answer to the question I have just been asked.